fustration is . . .

Having your facebook account deleted. For no reason. Sigh.

Add me here.

xoxo

love is . . .

* addison ann *

7.6.2009

3:40AM

7lbs 2oz

19.5" long

xoxo

love is . . .

Holiday weekends.

Except for people like me who work in billing and are chained to their desks the 1st weekend of every month regardless of what holiday falls around that time. Hopefully I will be leaving the office around noon tomorrow and will be with James before dinner time. We are heading up to Excelsior on Saturday for a day full of boating, time with his family/friends and of course fireworks. We cant wait!

What else is going on you ask?

Well Im still on my money tracking mission. I have all my records to share next week, complete with photo documentation - so keep an eye out for that. I also have a few new swoon worthy items I have book marked that I cant wait to tell you all about.

My cousin Becky and her husband Mike (and the rest of us) are ready to welcome their daughter Addison. She will be joining us at any moment. Literally, at any moment. Lets just hope if she doesnt join us today that she waits until Monday so that I be there for her arrival.

One last thing . . . today is Justin's birthday. He gets me through most days with talks about everything from Clueless to cars to white shoes to Selena. He's a great person and a great friend, even if he'd never admit it. Cheers!

Have a great, safe long weekend everyone - do something fun and tell someone you love them. See you all on Monday!

xoxo

item 1 . . .

I feel like Ive been spending a lot of time talking about saving money. And while that goal is not going anywhere, I would also like to add that I will never stop lusting over certain things, even if I now actually have the will power to restrain myself from indulging. So Ive decided that I would just write about the things I would buy if I could. It has to be just as fun right?

Item #1 - A key.

Why do I want a key? Well, if youve ever met me or seen a photo of me, youve most likely seen my teardrop. Ive been wearing it almost everyday since 2005. I bought it to symbolize the emotions I am not always good at sharing.

Sometimes when I am feeling down, I stop and concentrate on feeling the weight of the drop on my chest. I reach up, touch it and almost instantly I feel better. It may seem silly, but it reminds me to stay calm. Memories are always so close.

My drop will always be special to me, Ive clung to it in the worst of times. But now Im at a point where I finally feel safe, happy and content. My turning point.

quote of the day:

"getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars - you have to let go at some point in order to move forward"

xoxo

day 1 . . .

As Ive mentioned before, Im on a new quest to spend as little money as possible. I figure a good way to track this would be to blog about my daily spending here. My goal* is to keep my spending (not including bills/gas/groceries) under $10.00 per day. I am off to a good start I think:

6/29/2009

Lunch at Zios with Heidi - $5.14

So there you have it. Not very interesting I guess, but hopefully I can stay on target and save for the unexpected.

money quote of the day:

"the safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket."

xoxo

*This goal is null an void over the weekends as I easily spend $55.00 each time I drive up to MN. But hey, he's worth it. Trust.

love is . . .

Learning that sometimes, things really will be ok.

I bought my car in 2000. I still fondly remember the salesmen driving it up and handing me the keys. The interior was still wrapped in plastic, the odometer read 7 miles and the smell . . . well you never forget that "new car" smell.

Now that its been 9 years and over 120,000 miles - things are starting to rattle and new lights that Ive never seen are coming on. Ive always said I will drive this car until it blows up, well I almost got my wish while en route to MN this past weekend.

About 3 hours out of Rochester, my low oil pressure light came on. This had happened the week before also but I had been assured by the oil change place that everything was ok. So it came on again. I, of course, launched into full on panic mode, just like I do after anything unexpected happens. After pulling over at a rest station and trying to remain calm, I also noticed that the temperature gage was definitely higher than normal. Long story short, I drove with the windows down and the heat on full blast the rest of the way. I was a basket case the entire time, convinced that the car was going to blow up at any moment with me in it. And if it didnt blow up, I was pretty sure it would cost a mint to fix whatever the hell was going on with it this time.

James did his best to console me. He kept promising that he would take care of it as soon as I got there - if it meant him fixing it himself or him taking it and having it fixed for me. He kept telling me that it would be ok. He forced me to repeat it with him. I did so, even though I thought he was full of shit.

Had I been alone, I would have handled the situation by having the car towed to the nearest dealership and paying whatever it took to have it taken care of. He handled the situation by popping the hood and seeing that I was entirely out of coolant.

$8.99 later she was as good as new.

Things really will be ok. Im learning to love the sound of that.

quote of the day:
"there is nothing as remarkable as learning how to think better."

xoxo

love is . . .

Leaving behind a legacy.

I am truly saddened by the loss of such an incredible musical icon. Most likely, the greatest icon people my age will ever know. I find comfort knowing that he will live on and continue to influence others through his artistry. I can only hope that the 3 young children he left behind are able to one day find peace and live normal lives.

Its strange, just yesterday my ipod shuffled to Black or White. When it came on I couldn't help but smile as I remembered Amy and I dressing up in crazy outfits, doing silly song and dance routines to that song in front of my mom. She would always smile and clap, we would always be ready to change clothes and do another. Taking turns wearing the sparkly mitten of course.

I have always loved to dance - so picking just one of his songs as my favorite is impossible - as almost all of them make you want to drop what youre doing and hit a dance floor. But this song is different:



Id like to think it describes where I am in my life right now. Changing my ways never sounded so good.

quote of the day:
"I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
and no message could have been any clearer
if you wanna make the world a better place
take a look at yourself . . . and then make a change."

Goodbye Michael. I hope that the peace you never seemed to have has finally found you.


xoxo

love is . . .

Lunch at Zios with Jimmy.

Nothing can turn around a crappy morning like an hour (and a half) spent with him talking about boys, clothes, more boys and hearing him describe the 1st Transformers movie which I never saw.

All I took away is it had something to do with a cute boy, a cute girl, a cube, some glasses and a bumblebee. Is this enough to make me want to see the next one?

You betcha.


xoxo

love is . . .

Supporting things you love.

And while Im all for that, I think she is taking it a bit far. I mean, where does one even pick up a shark . . . errrr . . . marlin hat? Well anyway, at least the mac guy shares her love of pj pants.

I shouldnt judge too harsh I guess. I am thrilled to finally have some professional teams to support. This will be me in the fall Im sure . . . hold the barbwire.


xoxo

love is . . .

Saving money - by whipping up 12 breakfasts for under $3.00 - and feeling closer to mom while doing so.

As some of you may know, my mother was an avid baker. She loved it more than actual cooking she would often say. While she was here I often laughed at the idea of baking and cooking, convinced that doing either was what old ladies did . . . or women who weren't lucky enough to have someone there to always do it for them.

Now that I live on my own, I've entered the realm of women who must cook for themselves. I will admit that I was scared at first, but now that it's been awhile - I finally feel like Im getting the hang of it. Each time I break an egg, overcook something or forget an ingredient, I smile and think of her laughing wherever she is.

I've started cooking at home to save more money. I also cancelled my cable, stopped buying new clothes (and shoes and bags) and have even - GASP - started saving coupons. Being on my own has taught me how important it is to save what you can, while you can - just in case.

What else is going on you ask? Well, I have given up the "bar scene" for nights at home, enjoying quiet time with my beloved books. I've also been busy with school so that also helps keep me in line. But most of all, I have been spending lots of time driving to and from my boyfriend. Those of you who have been lucky enough to meet him know why I adore everything about him.

All of this clear thinking and clean living has helped me tremendously. I feel like my eyes are open for the 1st time in years. I feel truly blessed to have found peace, happiness and a man who makes me feel things I never have before.

Finally . . . I feel like my life is starting.
I can't wait to see where it goes.

quote of the day:
"when you can't have what you want, it's time to start wanting what you have."


xoxo